I grew up in a world that liked it's boxes. It liked being able to slot people and activities and music and styles of dress and relationships and beliefs neatly into categories that they then used to judge those very beliefs and relationships and styles of dress and music and activities and people. The world I grew up in claimed it's boxes from a religious perspective but other worlds I know claim them from cultural, socio-economic or simply 'tribal' bases.
One of the things I didn't learn well growing up - maybe because of my autism, or maybe because of my experiences of gaslighting - was which things were emotionally my responsibility, and which things were not my responsibility.
There's a post going around Facebook the last few weeks that goes like this ...
So many people tell me that choosing rest feels selfish. In the face of kids or partners or bosses that need us; in the face of bills or financial goals that keep pestering; in the face of housework or volunteer responsibilities or the constancy of social media, it can feel selfish to say, time-out!