Tools for the Toolbox
-
Shifting my Unmasking from Revealing to Unearthing
When I took the Values-Based Integration training, I hesitated to engage with the concept of unmasking again. I had already tried unmasking, and it went really badly. The only reason I showed up was because I had read about the process of finding values within your stories, which resonated with me in a way that Continue reading
-
Gentle Unmasking: Transformations Don’t Have To Be Painful
I used to be the “tough love” therapist. I believed confronting people with the “truth” would be an emotional jolt that could facilitate change. And sometimes it worked. Whenever I met with clients who were intellectualisers like me, being presented with a new “theory” or idea offered a “high”. New and novel perspectives can feel Continue reading
-
Tools in Your Toolbox – Know Your Zones
It’s hard to make changes if you don’t understand where you are now, or where you want to go. Many people out there are pretty clear on their emotions – what they feel, why, and what strategies work best for them to help resolve challenges that may come up along the way. But some of Continue reading
-
Tools in your Toolbox – What Makes You Come Alive?
One of the first questions that we need to ask with our compassionate curiosity is what makes you come alive? The reason is simple – all of us are exposed to lots of different voices, from lots of different directions. Everyone wants to tell us how to live, how to think, how to make decisions, what Continue reading
-
Tools in your Toolbox – Compassionate Curiosity
One of the most powerful tools in the journey towards wholeness is compassionate curiosity. That’s because many of us go about our days doing things and reacting and interacting with other people without ever stopping and thinking about why we do what we do. But what if there was always a reason for the things that we did? Continue reading
-
Tools for Life in Physical Isolation
After three years of living mostly in physical isolation, I’ve learned a fair amount about this way of doing life. As such I figured I’d put out some resources over the coming days to share some of what I’ve learned. Tool #1 – Rhythm, Ritual and Rest *Create rhythms to your day, marked by when Continue reading
-
Emotional Regulation in Hard Times
Some suggestions for emotional self regulation during hard times: Create intentional PLANS and SCHEDULES to help organise your day and increase your sense of AGENCY and CONTROL. Don’t be afraid to Make these plans VISUAL in a notebook or on a board. Use MOVEMENT and CREATIVITY to allow your body to process stress as it Continue reading
-
A ‘Third Way’
Do you ever feel backed into a corner in an argument? Or forced to choose sides between polarizing forces? Perhaps in your intimate partner or family relationships? Perhaps in our wider, increasingly divisive social sphere? One of the biggest relationship-savers that Trevor and I have discovered over the last few years is to recognize when Continue reading
-
On Grieving
A year ago I was sitting in bed mid-way through watching ‘Beauty and the Beast’ with my daughter when the phone rang. Through sobs and gasps I heard a very good friend utter the devastating words … “he’s dead”. Her world had shattered in a heartbeat – completely out of the blue. That morning her Continue reading
-
Emotional Workflow
One of the things I didn’t learn well growing up – maybe because of my autism, or maybe because of my experiences of gaslighting – was which things were emotionally my responsibility, and which things were not my responsibility. Continue reading
About the program
In 2017 I was newly self-diagnosed with atypical autism, struggling with burnout, and striking out when it came to therapists who could address the issues I was facing. At the same time, I was building skills around life coaching, shame reduction, and trauma-informed therapy for work. Gradually I realized that what I needed – an embodied, autonomous, agency-driven coaching approach to unmasking – was not something I was going to find “out there”, but something I was going to need to create if I wanted to recover my life. This was the moment the Values Based Integration Process was born.
Having developed the program for myself – and having seen the incredible results it brought in my own life – I began to use it with coaching clients. The results were out of this world!
After conversations with Dr. Devon Price, the technique was featured in his book Unmasking Autism. With it, came interest in the technique and the decision was made to begin training coaches and therapists to help make this toolkit more readily available.
Powered by Love 